Half-Begun and Unfinished
by Loki Firefox
Summary: This is not a fic, this is basically a repository of ideas and stories I have that have not yet made into a story (and probably won't) or scenes from existing fics that went to the cutting room floor. This is categorized as Glee but expect some other fandoms here like Harry Potter and even Twilight. Yes, Twilight. Rated M for safety reasons.
1. Introduction

A lot of writers I follow have posts like this, where they include chapters or scenes that aren't fully-fleshed out or didn't go anywhere or were cut from the story. I actually have put together quite a few (and a whole lot more I've deleted) and I decided to post it here. Please take the title seriously, these are ideas that didn't go anywhere so while I'm not saying I will never continue these stories, please don't hold your breath.

Technically both _Power Play, Cats vs Dogs_ and _Titans vs Wolves_ should be included here and _A Long Time Coming_ barely made the cut to full-fledged one-shot. But I'm not transferring those stories but it should give you an idea of what to expect.

I tend to write scenes and then spin the story from there, sometimes it works (_You Don't_), most of the time it doesn't (_Something New_).

Expect to see a lot of activity for the next couple of days and then watch it dry out. I'm not a prolific writer so we will hit the limit of unfinished and half-begun stories really quickly.

Also, pretty much all of these are un-betaed. So advance warning to my fellow grammarians, verb-tense agreements will be considered an endangered animal here so I apologize for hurting your brain and annoying you in advance.

Okay, that's it. I hope you enjoy it for what it is. If these stories interest you and you decide to run with it, drop me a line so I can see your take on it. I'd love to read what you got.

Cheers!


	2. Rachel Talks to Blaine

**_I was watching Tested and it was during Kurt and Blaine's fight that I got pissed on Blaine's behalf. I see Blaine with rose-tinted glasses so I tend to pick his side but at the same time I've noticed that Kurt only wants to be communicative when it's at his convenience. However that's not what this scene is about._**

**_I actually stopped playing the episode to write this and then continued watching the episode after so there goes my inclusion of Julie as part of the group._**

**_As you can tell, it's just a scene. I may use it in the future, or this will be it._**

* * *

"You know, I just realized this is only the second time I've been here?"

Blaine looked up from the couch. Rachel noticed that he hadn't even taken off his coat yet. His eyes had lost the burning anger from earlier and were just sad and incredibly lost.

"I'm sorry about this evening," Blaine mumbled looking back down on his hands.

Rachel took off her coat and hung it and walked into the living room. She sat on the easy chair and leaned towards Blaine.

"It's okay," she assured him. "Sam and Artie took Mercedes and Julie out for some ice cream. Kurt was going to come here to yell at you some more but I told him to let me come after you while he should channel that anger and clean the dishes instead."

Blaine looked up and Rachel could see the flint back in his eyes. "Let him come," Blaine said quietly. "I'm not exactly done—"

"Blaine," Rachel interrupted. "This is why I came. Whatever is going on between you and Kurt, shouting at each other isn't going to resolve it."

Rachel could see Blaine deflate and she realized that the anger had long since gone and what she saw a second ago was just an act.

"What's going on with you, Blaine?" She was deeply worried for her friend. "I know I'm pretty self-absorbed and I haven't always been the best friend to all of you guys but I'm here now. Things with Kurt have been strained, haven't they?"

The silence stretched between them but Rachel buried her impatience. She let it stretch, knowing that Blaine needed someone to listen to him and he'll talk eventually. Usually Sam was his go-to-guy for this but Sam has been preoccupied with Mercedes lately so Rachel decided to step-up.

Sooner than she expected, Blaine sighed and then slowly started removing his coat. "It's supposed to get better."

"What was?" Rachel cursed herself, she should have just made a noise. She didn't want to interrupt his train of thought. Fortunately she didn't think she did because Blaine went on talking. He must have been keeping this to himself for a while now.

"New York," he said. "Things were supposed to be better here. We get our lives and we live it. It's not like high school where everything was always "not right now" or "be careful". Here we're supposed to be together and then live the rest of our lives."

Blaine looked at Rachel directly. "It's supposed to be better."

"But it isn't?"

"No," Blaine ran his hand through his hair uncaring that it broke his curls loose. "It isn't."

"Tell me about it," Rachel prodded when Blaine didn't say anything else.

"Everyone in NYADA hates me," Blaine said almost resentfully. "The students give me the side-eye and, no, I'm _not_ imagining it. And the teachers! They pile me with more work than everyone else and their expectations are unrealistic! I just started in September! How am I supposed to know these things?!"

Blaine got up and started pacing.

"And Kurt! Instead of supporting me, he just shrugs his shoulders like, "well, it wasn't easy for me either you'll get the hang of it soon enough". He's my fiancé, shouldn't he be in my corner?"

"I know I know," Blaine said as if he was interrupting Rachel but she wasn't planning on saying anything yet. "I was really smothering him when I got here but I missed him! I thought I lost him and he took me back, I admit I went a little overboard with being in his space but he didn't say anything! That's another thing," Blaine starts to heat up again, "we never communicate anymore! He never tells me if I'm bothering him or anything really. I tell him my day and when I expect him to tell me his he just nods at me and then goes back to what he was doing!" Blaine looks at Rachel and she's surprised to see the anger back and this time it _wasn't_ an act. She supposed Blaine got his second wind. "Did he tell you about the porn site?"

Rachel nodded. How could she not?

"Funny, when I told him that we should talk about it, he said that all we do is talk but then he talks to you about it," Blaine bites out as he rubs the heel of his palm into one of his eyes in frustration.

"When I get stressed out, I eat," Blaine admits. "I used to be a chubby kid and that plus being gay meant a lot of crap got handed to me. When I was beaten up I was in the hospital for weeks. I lost a lot of weight there and I decided to use that opportunity to keep the weight off. And since then, I haven't done any nervous eating until I got here, when all of this started to get to me and the person who's supposed to help me out, isn't."

"I feel ugly, Rachel," Blaine said with a sigh, anger leaving him once more, collapsing back on the couch. "That's why I Kurt and I haven't had sex in a while. I feel bloated and fat and like I'm 14 again and the bullies are out to get me, except they're here in New York where I thought I would finally be accepted. And my fiancé can't be bothered to find out what's going on with me."

Rachel gets up from the chair and sits beside Blaine, and grabbing his hand, feels relief when he lets her.

"Blaine, you know that Kurt is my best friend, right?"

"I know," he says. "I understand if you're on his side—"

"No no no no," Rachel interrupts with a smile. "That's not what I meant to say." Blaine looks at her, puzzled. "Kurt is my best friend," she begins again. "I love him to death and I admire him so please remember that when I ask you why did you propose to him?"

"Because he's my soulmate!" Blaine exclaims. "Of all people, Rach, I think you would understand..."

"I do," Rachel says, fighting down the lump that always gets to her when she thinks of Finn but it's easier now. It's been getting easier and she doesn't know if she should be grateful or sad about it. "But the thing is, Finn and I didn't get that chance to figure it out. To be honest, the Finn I loved was the Finn I knew in McKinley. Finn changed, Blaine, and so did I. We had to. We grew up. Would we still love each other? I'll never know.

"But you and Kurt," she says squeezing his hands, "you have that chance to figure it out. But you didn't. Blaine, you proposed without getting to know Kurt again. Honestly I thought you proposed because you wanted to prove that you are not a cheater or a terrible person. I know you love Kurt, I don't doubt that, but which Kurt do you love?"

Rachel knows that last one will force a response from Blaine so she put a finger on his lips and charged on. "You say you know he's changed since coming to New York but what you don't realize is how much _you_ changed since he left. You are two different people now and yet you're behaving like the past year didn't happen. You haven't acknowledged the new Blaine and if _he_ loves the new Kurt. And it's not just you; Kurt isn't exactly getting to know the new you either. He just gets upset when you don't act like you used to."

Finally done, she puts her finger down and grabs both of Blaine's hand. She braces herself for the outburst until she remembers that of all her friends, Blaine is the least likely to shout at her, no matter what she says. So she relaxes and just waits him out.

"You're right," Blaine says after a while. "So what do I do?"

"Uh-uh," Rachel says cuddling close to Blaine, glad that he isn't upset with her, and laying her head on his chest. She feels his arm wrap around her shoulders, pulling her close. As much as she loved Finn, she has always been amazed at how well she and Blaine just _fit_. If only...she sighed with a giggle to herself, if only indeed. "I have reached the end of my duties as friend. You guys will have to figure it out from here. At this point on, my involvement will just be meddling. I may not know a lot about being a good friend, but I'm pretty experienced about being a bad one and this is "bad friend" territory."

"I think you're a pretty good friend, Rachel Berry," Blaine said with a quiet laugh. "Thanks."

"You're welcome."

They sit in silence for a while. Then Rachel clears her throat. She feels as well as hears Blaine's chuckle. "What?"

"I just realized why everyone in NYADA hates you."

"Ouch," Blaine says but she can feel the smile in it. "I thought you're supposed to say that I'm imagining it."

"Actually, no you're not," Rachel says with a wince.

"They hate me?" Rachel winces again when she hears the hurt in Blaine's voice. She sighs and sits up.

"Blaine, I'm no longer in NYADA but I still keep in touch with what goes on there."

"You mean Kurt tells you everything."

"Same thing," Rachel says dismissively. "I want you to realize something and I don't want you to get hurt because it will _sound_ like it will but...do you trust me?"

"Yes, but what—"

"If you trust me," she says interrupting him, "then let me say all of this without interruptions, okay? I promise you will have a chance to refute me _if_ I'm wrong after I've said my piece, okay?"

She takes Blaine's silence as agreement and takes a deep breath.

"Blaine I know you like to think you were a loser like us back in high school but you really weren't. Think about it, you became student body president after being in school for only one year; you were captain of the Cheerios and the only one that Coach Sylvester went after to get back on the squad. She didn't go after Quinn, Santana or Brittany but she went after you and only after a _day_ of being a Cheerio. You became the head of pretty much all the clubs you joined, you were the New Rachel of New Directions—and deservedly so—you were my Tony when you were a junior and from what Mercedes told me, you would have been Danny if you didn't turn it down. You were never slushied despite being out and proud and a member of more geeky clubs than me and Kurt combined, the one time you were slushied it wasn't by a McKinley student and you weren't the actual target. And finally, you were the class valedictorian despite not having the highest GPA.

"Face it, you led a charmed life in high school. Don't get me wrong, Blaine, you are definitely one of us and we love you but you were never a _loser_ like the rest of us."

She interrupts him seeing him defending them all by saying they aren't "losers", bless him he's so predictable. "You know what I mean, Blaine. To _them_ we were losers...but you never were."

"Things have always come easy for you, you never had to struggle half-as-hard as the rest of us had to. I know, you have had other struggles, but never in school. But ths time it's _school_ that's giving you problems and you don't have the experience to handle it."

Rachel paused and looked at Blaine and she could she see his brows furrowing as he was taking it all in.

"Think about it, you got in NYADA on your first try—both Kurt and I had to basically beg Mme. Tibideaux to let us audition again. And from Kurt tells me of the rumors going around NYADA, you gave the best audition of your batch. Of your eight classes you share six of them with Kurt and other _upperclassmen_ and of the other two, you only share one with other freshmen because it's a prerequisite and the other is a special class filled with one junior and six seniors. You are the first freshman to be in that class. Ever.

"You convinced Mme. Tibideaux to basically let you skip a year _and she agreed. _You did this all so you could be with Kurt and your focus has been to be with him. You aren't really focusing on your studies and yet _you are getting by_. Blaine, you are so talented it actually hurts to think about it. I love you and you're one of my best friends but sometimes I get so jealous of you it makes me want to scream. Can you imagine what the rest of the school, who you are a stranger to, must be feeling?

"I'm not surprised that the other students hate you, they probably want to see what's so special about you and I'm sure the teachers have high expectations because Mme. Tibideaux basically said you are the Golden Boy of NYADA.

"And Blaine, you're letting her down."

Blaine snapped his head to meet her and Rachel grabbed his hands again.

"She went out on a limb for you and extended a special privilege and you aren't holding up your end of the bargain."

"I would never think of you as Carmen Tibideaux's defender, Rachel," Blaine said, his voice hoarse.

"Just because I disagreed with her doesn't take away the fact that she's an icon and deserves my respect." Rachel shrugged. "I know what it's like to be given that special privilege. She gave it to me and Kurt, too, you know by letting us audition again. I'm just happy that I at least proved to everybody that I was worthy of that before we parted ways.

"No matter what happens between you and Kurt, don't let her down Blaine. I know what that feels like and while I know I'm right for leaving, it still hurt doing it."

* * *

_**I have this idea where Blaine takes Rachel's words to heart and starts focusing on his studies and quickly proves that Carmen Tibideaux wasn't wrong about him. Of course this means Blaine and Kurt's relationship bites the dust, but I write Blam so no one who knows me should be at all surprised. I ran out of ideas after this scene ended so this was supposed to end here but now that I've seen Back-Up Plan, with the introduction of June, this little scene may have just gotten a second lease on life.**_


	3. No More Blainey Days

_**I used to like Tina and I have the biggest respect for Jenna Ushkowitz for making the most after being given so little. But I can't believe they just let what she did go. This is sorta another **_**A Long Time Coming**_**-type of fic.**_

* * *

"Hey Bling-Bling!"

Blaine grimaced hearing Tina's cheerful greeting. He was at his locker getting the stuff he needed for his homework. He was hoping to avoid Tina and he almost made it out of school but here she was. He shoved his books back into his locker with an uncharacteristic show of anger and all but slammed his locker shut. He still couldn't believe what Tina did! She dumped Sam in front of everyone...granted they aren't actually dating (thank God!) so it's not like she broke his heart or anything but to cast him away like that because she wants to win some stupid popularity contest decided by people she didn't even like! And then to sing about it! It's a good thing the bell rang so he had an excuse to leave because he may have just walked out.

"Hey Blainey-Days," Tina jabbered excitedly as she drew up beside him, "so I was thinking we go over to your place and check out my options for prom dresses..."

"I don't think so Tina," Blaine said trying to keep his voice neutral, not wanting to make a scene but Tina just kept blathering on, ignoring him.

"...maybe in purple because I saw this gorgeous off-the-shoulder one in green but green really isn't my color and purple just screams "royalty", you know? Maybe we can get a similar cut but in purple? There was one in bronze and while metallics aren't really me, this was just so—"

"Tina I'm not helping you pick a prom dress!" And if Blaine noticed the edge in his voice, then Tina definitely did. She stopped with a shocked and hurt expression on her face; but instead of making him feel guilty, it just fuelled Blaine's anger as it proved just how self-centered Tina has become.

"Blaine...?"

"Do you really think I'm just going to ignore the fact that you just dumped Sam in front of all our friends?"

"Wait? What? Sam?" Tina looked shocked, and then to Blaine's mounting fury she rolled her eyes and then made a dismissive gesture with her hand. "Oh please, it's not like I broke his heart or anything. We aren't together, Blaine," she added in a tone like Blaine was six years old, "and while I know that to you everything is life-or-death when it comes to Sam, it's really no big deal."

Blaine looked at Tina hard and then shook his head. "I don't know who you are anymore."

"What is that supposed to mean?!" Tina, offended, practically shouts at Blaine, apparently not caring that she is about to make a scene.

"The Tina I knew cared more for her friends than some stupid popularity contest! The Tina who was my best friend would be sensitive enough not to publically dump one of her friends in the same room where his ex-girlfriend also dumped him—also in public!"

"Of course you're upset! St. Samuel Fishlips had his feelings hurt! Whoop-de-doo! Here comes Sir Blaine the Valiant charging to the rescue!"

"Bullshit!" Blaine yelled back, not caring anymore if they were making a spectacle of themselves. "I would feel the same way if you did that to Ryder, Artie or to anyone in there! Because what you did in there? That was douche thing to do!"

"Easy for you to say! You're Mr. Perfect! Everything gets handed to you! I have to fight for everything! Every solo! Every scrap of recognition! This was supposed to be _my_ year! I put up with Rachel's and Santana's crap but now it's _my_ turn! _My_ turn to be lead! _My_ turn to be queen! It's _mine_ dammit! I deserve this more than anyone and I'll be damned if I let anyone get in my way!"

Tina has worked herself up into a fury and Blaine could see that she's not backing down. He forced himself to calm down. He lets the silence grow and he can see she's thrown off and confused by his sudden silence. She expected him to have shouted back and he would have but he doesn't really see the point anymore. He arranges the strap of his bag and makes sure he has everything he needs (nothing ruins a good exit than having to come back to the scene because he forgot something) then he gives her his most scornful look.

"Well congratulations Tina...you've managed to become a bigger bitch than Santana and Rachel combined," Blaine said just managing not to say it in a British accent and turned around and walked away.

Blaine saw that the corridors were empty as he walked to the parking lot. Hopefully that meant that his and Tina's fight wasn't observed and they just didn't make asses of themselves. He dug into his bag for his car keys and he noticed his hands were shaking. One part of his brain was coldly assessing that it was either the adrenaline still pumping into him or his anger still affecting him; but the other part was more like "holyshitIjustcalledTinaabitch!toherface!TinaandIjustshoutedateachotherinschool!fuck!"

"Blaine?"

Blaine almost dropped his keys as he spun around to see a worried-looking Sam.

"Sam!" he said, rather stupidly. "Um...hey, was I supposed to give you a ride?" He asked lamely.

"No dude," Sam said with a serious expression, "I have the car, it's just that, um..."

"You heard?" Blaine asked with a sigh.

"Kinda hard not to," Sam said with shrug.

"I'm surprised the whole school wasn't there," Blaine said, looking down at his hands...which were still shaking. He wondered if he would shake the nails off his fingers?

"They would have been, except Lipoff and Surette got into a huge fight over that red-headed Cheerio? Linda? Leslie? Lucy?"

"D-dana," Blaine said absently, not noticing his stammer, instead he focused on forcing his fingers to form into fists hoping to keep them from shaking.

"Yeah, Dana, that's right...dude, are you all right?" Sam asked grasping his shoulder.

"I j-j-just c-c-can't-t-t s-s-st-t-top s-s-sh-sh-shak-k-k-ing," Blaine said as he felt tears pool behind his eyes.

"Hey, it's okay," Sam immediately pulls Blaine into a hug. "It's just the adrenaline. You worked yourself up and you tried to suppress it. It's just trying to find an outlet. You must have been really pissed."

"Y-yes," Blaine said. He wanted to say more but he didn't want to stammer so he allowed himself to relax in Sam's arms instead. Wrapped in Sam's embrace, he knew he was safe and his body started to relax. After a few minutes he squeezed Sam who understood and released Blaine.

"Thanks."

"Blaine, dude, after what you did, defending me to Tina, it's the least I could do."

Blaine tries, but fails, to suppress a grimace. "That's right. You heard."

"Thanks Blaine, for standing up for me," Sam says with a soft smile and a light punch to Blaine's shoulder. "But Tina was right you know, it wasn't like I was heart-broken or anything."

"So not the point Sam," Blaine answers back with his own smile and punch. "No one is allowed to treat my friends that way, not while I'm around."

The two horse around a bit, boxing a bit, laughing, then go out to the parking lot together.

"So," Sam says with a pensive look to his face. Blaine just looks up at him, waiting for Sam to continue.

"It looks like I don't have a date for prom," he finally says.

Blaine can't help but roll his eyes and smile, "I think that's been established. But don't worry Sam, I'm sure any girl you ask would jump at the chance to go with you."

"I don't want to ask some random girl," Sam said shrugging.

"Well I don't feel like going either," Blaine offers, "wanna have a bro-night instead? We can watch prom-disaster movies like Carrie and—"

"Well that's the thing," Sam bites his lips as he interrupts Blaine, "this is like our Senior Prom, we're supposed to look back on this with fond memories and such so I kinda want to go but I don't want to spend it with a stranger, even if she is a hot, red-headed Cheerio."

"I thought Lipoff or Surette was taking her?" Blaine asked leaning on his car as the two finally made it there. He could see the Hummels' old truck that Burt let Sam drive sometimes, two spaces away in the relatively empty parking lot.

"Both of them got suspended for fighting and are not allowed to go prom anymore and Lisa—"

"Dana."

"—kept giving me the cow eyes."

"Cow eyes?" Blaine asked in amusement.

"Focus, Blaine," Sam said in seriousness and Blaine fought to keep from smiling...he failed but at least he tried. "The point is, I want to go with someone I already know, a friend, so I'll have fun and not worry about being a good date to Gina—"

"Dana."

"—even if she does have a great rack."

"Well, the only girls you know well are in glee and Marley is going with Jake—but they are also kinda doing this weird, quadruple-date thing with Ryder and Unique—Artie is taking Kitty so I guess that leaves...Sugar?"

"True but if I'm going to go with a friend; I might as well go with the best one I have, right?" Sam dropped the semi-serious expression and Blaine could see the Evans smile starting to come out.

"Sam Evans," he starts and can't help but blush (oh traitorous face!), "are you asking me to be your date to prom?"

"Well," Sam says smiling unabashedly now, "you are one of the prettiest Cheerios around even if Donna has a better rack."

"Da—heh, close enough," Blaine shrugs. "Pretty, huh?"

"Well, yeah," Sam says rolling his eyes, "I got to keep up my rep, dude. I dated the Unholy Trinity and lived to talk about it. I can't show up to my Senior Prom without the Cheerios captain on my arm."

"Even if Dana has a better rack?"

"Who's Dana?"

Blaine finally broke and started laughing. It didn't help when Sam sincerely kept asking who Dana was. Sam finally gave up asking and waited until Blaine calmed down.

"So are you coming with me or what?"

"Of course Sam," Blaine said fondly, "I think it's a brilliant idea. Pick me up at seven? I expect a boutonniere."

"Can you pick me up instead? Your car's nicer," Sam said pointing at the old truck.

"Fine," Blaine said, pretending to be exasperated and he knew Sam saw right through it.

"And you better getter the button air thingie too because I have no idea what that is," Sam added.

"You're probably right," Blaine mused.

"Hey, wanna match outfits?" Sam asked excitedly. "Maybe we can match your tie to my vest or something."

"Wanna come over and look at tuxes and suits?"

"Follow me home so I can leave the car and I'll ride to your place with you," Sam said.

"Okay," Blaine says as he unlocks his car remotely. Sam quickly jogs to his truck.

"Hey Blaine!"

Blaine turns to Sam as he opened his car door.

"Can we get a limo?"

Blaine grins and can't help but chuckle as he answers, "Sure thing Sam!"

"And take me nice for dinner! Not Breadstix!"

"I thought _you_ were taking _me_!" Blaine shouted back.

Sam doesn't answer just winks at Blaine and gets in the truck. Blaine rolls his eyes and laughs quietly as he gets in his car. At least now prom looks like it's going to be fun.

* * *

**A/N - **I was rereading SageK's fics (as I am wont to do) and came across her _The First Night of the Rest of Their Lives_ again and I can see many similarities between this fic and that. I am completely not surprised by this, this is not a coincidence. SageK has a huge influence on my work, she basically writes down stuff I want to happen to Blam, stuff I didn't even know I wanted but makes perfect sense when I read it in her fics. I also reread her stuff a lot so it should come as to no surprise that so many things get absorbed through osmosis and gets regurgitated in my stuff. So if you're wondering if this fic has taken stuff from SageK, the answer is an absolute yes.


	4. Olympia

_**Holy Smokes! Yes this is a Twilight fic. Don't laugh. Twilight got me started on fanfic and reading the good stuff and the bad stuff taught me a lot about story-telling.**_

_**This never went anywhere because by the time I started writing this I was already losing interest in this fandom.**_

* * *

"It's done."

Not for the first time I wonder at the coldness of Emmett's voice. And I'm sure it won't be the last. Of all the things that we have lost since that day, and we lost so many things, as these days pass, I find the loss of Emmett's joy to be one of the worst. We need it, especially now. It's funny, his laughter and his smiles were such a big part of who he was that their absence has made him almost a stranger to me. A "stranger", now that is funny, considering he is one of the very few people I completely and fully trust.

"Good," I reply. I pause before asking the next question. I always do. I can't stand the thought of losing anyone else. "Is everyone all right?"

"We're fine, Bella," Emmett says. I expect him to sigh in frustration or answer in a clipped tone and sometimes I even hope that someday he might chuckle at my anxiety—but he doesn't. He never does, he never does any of those things. I would think that he would start to get a little irritated by this constant question. He's never lost anyone when he leads these hunts. He swore never to lose anyone again since that day and he never has. He expects me to ask, though, he doesn't begrudge me that. "Quil got battered but he'll pull through. Not his fault, Heidi was just too fast for him. Lucky for him Jasper was faster. I'll be sending most of the squad home. Jasper and I will stick around for clean-up. I'll call again tomorrow."

"All right Emmett. Goodbye."

I put down my phone and look out the window. Heidi's gone. She was the last, the last of the Volturi. I should feel something, maybe not joy exactly or triumph but at least some level of satisfaction. Nothing. I don't feel anything but the gaping hole where my heart should be.

From my window I see Carmen and Renesmee in the garden. My heart aches when I see her bronze hair glinting when stray moonlight hits it. Perhaps my heart is here after all, it still aches, doesn't it? If something feels pain, there must be something there to feel it, right? I'm grateful that my daughter didn't inherit his gift. I would never wish her to know how her very presence makes me feel like screaming at the world. I would never wish her to know that when she smiles at me with that crooked smile how I want to turn around and lash out, annihilate anything I can get my hands on so that what my eyes see can match the oblivion inside.

But that would not be fair to her, my beautiful Renesmee. She may unintentionally keep my grief fresh but she is what keeps me sane. Her smile is crooked like his but there's a twist in there that's all her own. Her hair is the same bronze but those curls and the length are all hers. I failed my daughter. I allowed this cruel world to hurt her. I swear to myself again, as I have since I held his killer's head in my hands, it would do so only once. I would do anything to make sure that she will never be hurt again. I would obliterate anything that would even think to do so.

I hear Garrett enter. I speak to him without turning my head, keeping my eyes on my daughter.

"It's done," I say, unintentionally repeating Emmett's words. Knowing what he'll ask next, I turn to face him and tell him what he really wants to know. "Kate and the others will be back tomorrow."

Garrett's shoulders lose some of the stiffness that's been on him since Emmett and the rest left three weeks ago; when they finally got a solid lead on Heidi's whereabouts. It chafed him to stay here while the others went on the hunt but we needed at least one of the fighters to stay here for defense. It made better sense to send Kate instead of Garrett. While Heidi's ability works—perhaps I should say _worked_—on both sexes, it was blunted by those who were mated and those of the same sex, which is why Kate, Jasper and the wolves that were imprinted went with Emmett.

"Emmett and Jasper are doing the clean-up?"

"Yes," I say, "they'll be back in a day or two depending how many loose ends Heidi left behind."

Garrett nods his head. "So, it's finally over."

I couldn't help but raise my eyebrows in surprise, Garrett is usually pretty savvy. How can he think just because the Volturi are gone that it's over?

Garrett sees my reaction. "I know, I know," he sighs. "The destruction of the Volturi has left a power vacuum—"

"—which we, for better or for worse, are filling up," I say interrupting him. "Better us than someone else."

"Bella," he starts gently. "Do we really need to?"

"Garrett you know the arguments better than anyone else here," I say, not letting my exasperation color my voice. "The Volturi, evil as they were, did keep some sort of order among us. We need to keep that order in place for everyone's sakes. I don't want to do it but as things stand we are the only ones who can actually pull it off."

I turn back to the window and watch Renesmee and Carmen sitting under the tree doing needlepoint. I can't help but smile. Renesmee hates needlepoint but it's useful in teaching her control, as well as patience. I'll be damned if I let anyone put themselves in a position of power that will allow them to hurt her.

"Besides, some of us have nothing better to do," I quip, at least I try to. It falls flat. For some of us, knowing that we'll be facing eternity alone, we need to do something to occupy our time, something that will consume us so we can distract ourselves from the emptiness inside.

Garrett flinches. I feel bad for making him feel bad. It's not his fault that his mate survived. I smile up at him and reach over and lightly touch his arm, trying to convey my apology for making him feel uneasy. He seems startled and blinks rapidly, then lets out a big unnecessary breath. That reaction throws me a bit but he gives me his lopsided grin and I know we're both all right.

"I'll do my rounds," he says. "It's about time to relieve Jacob." His grin suddenly widens and he takes a step back and makes an elaborate bow. "By your leave?"

I roll my eyes at his display. "Go on, get out of here and do something useful."

He chuckles as he walks out of the room. I follow him a minute later. I head to the kitchen to prepare dinner. Embry and Seth weren't eating here tonight so I will just be cooking for Jacob and Renesmee.

I hate to admit it but I was more than a little disturbed by Garrett's bow. I know he was just teasing but I have noticed that people have been treating me differently. The Cullens, despite being whittled down, is still the largest vampire coven in the world, especially now that the Volturi are no more. We may not have anything like the Volturi Guard but ever since we merged with the Denali coven and strengthened our alliance with the Quileute wolves, we are more than capable of carrying out their former duties. In doing so, we may have taken on other things as well, the perception of being the "Royal Family" of the vampire world.

The thought makes me uncomfortable. It doesn't help that people think that I lead the Cullens and by extension what is now called the "Olympic Council". Vampire Queen. I shake my head at the thought. This is why these dinners are so important to me. It grounds me. It's something simple where I can try to be normal. Just a mother and her daughter having dinner with a friend…who's imprinted on her daughter, who looks like she's eight even though she's only two years old…I should have stopped at "friend". Well if Jake is good at one thing, it's to remind who I am.

-oOo-

Garrett walks swiftly out of the house. He immediately picks up Jacob's trail and walks towards him. It's funny how one can quickly become used to the smell. It's still not pleasant but it's hardly what he'd list as the worst things in the world to smell.

Garrett was surprised at how relieved he was learning that Kate was safe. He hadn't realized until that moment how worried he was until Bella told him that she was all right. Well, judging from Bella, Emmett and…him—he didn't really want to think about him—losing one's mate is not something one would like to go through.

It is interesting to Garrett thinking about how differently they each try to cope with their losses. He was most surprised at Emmett, seeing him become almost completely emotionless, choosing not to feel anything so he didn't have to feel the pain. Garrett thought about Jasper telling him one day that he can barely feel anything from Emmett at all. It was that testimony from Garrett that finally convinced Bella to let Emmett go after Heidi with the rest. Jasper was sure that Heidi would have nothing to use. Garrett remembered that day; it was a tense moment, when Bella basically forbade Emmett the chance to go after Heidi. Garrett was sure that Emmett was going to snap but all he did was stand there patiently. After a minute, Bella just looked at Jasper and Jasper nodded. It was a test! And brilliantly done, too.

Garrett's admiration for Bella was no secret. His love for Kate is eternal and absolute but he can't help but feel a little love for his queen as well. Now that is funny. The revolutionary has become a royalist. But this was how Bella coped with her loss. She couldn't protect Edward, so now she's decided to protect everyone else. Garrett thought back when she reached out and touched his arm. He wonders again at her innocence, that she has absolutely no idea of her effect on people. Her beauty coupled with the strength of will and the courage not to close off her heart despite her loss just so she can ably serve the remaining members of her family. A family, Garrett thinks, that I have somehow become a part of.

His ruminations are interrupted, he can sense that Jacob is nearby.

"Ho wolf!" He calls out. "Anything to report?"

The monstrous russet wolf practically fades in from the surrounding woods. As Jacob shifts to his human form, Garrett still wonders how something so huge could be so quiet, or so invisible. If it weren't for the scent, he would never know Jacob was there.

"Everything's quiet," Jacob says. "Peter and Charlotte are overdue but only by a couple of hours. I'm sure they went off to hunt again just in case."

Garrett nods. He sympathizes with them being a new vegetarian himself. "I'll give them a call if I don't hear from them or see them soon."

"Have you heard from Emmett?"

Garrett breaks out into a smile. "Kate's fine, Jake, thanks for asking."

Jacob smiles warmly back at Garrett. Jacob and Garrett had quickly become friends and he was relieved for him.

"Good. Well then I'll head on in." With a grin Jacob quickly shifts back to a wolf and lopes towards the house.

As Garrett starts his patrol, he wonders again at the changes Bella and the others are slowly instituting. The huge changes appeal to his revolutionary spirit; however he can't help but feel a small twinge seeing as he's now on the side of the establishment.

Ah, but that's the true revolutionary, isn't it? Being an agent of change?


	5. Brand New Ground Alternate Epiphany

_**Obviously **_**BNG**_** has not been updated yet so for those of you loyal readers, here's a little something for you. It's not quite a new chapter and this bit is no longer valid but you might like it anyway. TheFauxMe happily gave her okay to post this so I hope you enjoy it since this is almost entirely my idea of how the big reveal would have happened.**_

_**This is an alternate version of how Blaine and Sam learn of their feelings for each other.**_

* * *

Blaine slowly woke up. He could feel the soft, sheets rumpled against him. There was a warm, solid weight on his right side. _Sam._ He could smell him. Sam smelled of soap and a very faint but sweet remnant of his sister's baby cologne (which he would grab to use on his way out of the house, usually because he was running late) mixed with scent that was just 'Sam'.

Blaine opened his eyes and he was rewarded with the sight of a sleeping Sam beside him. His chest slowly rising up and down. Blaine shifted on his side and propped his head up with right arm and with his left hand, slowly placed his palm on Sam's chest. More than the silky smoothness of his skin, more than the tightness of his muscles which were defined even in this state of relaxation, it was the sheer _warmth _of him that he wondered at. Sam was like a sun in human form. It seemed that the day agreed with him, a ray of sunshine peeked over his window and turned Sam's blond hair into gold and gave his fading golden tanned skin a glow.

_I'm so screwed,_ he thought. Tears pooled in his eyes. He was in love with the most infuriating, the kindest, most selfless, most beautiful man in the world. And he would never be loved the same way. He didn't doubt that Sam loved him. After everything Sam's done for him, he could lose faith in gravity first before he ever doubted Sam, he knew that Sam loved him. But Sam could never be _in love _with him and after Sam, how could anyone else compare? A sad smile twisted his mouth. _You ruined me for anyone else you know, but I don't care if that's the price for having you these past months. So worth it. _

Because Blaine knew it was going to end now. The charade has to stop. Not because it served its purpose, which it surprisingly did—Sam is never going to let him forget it—but because it had become real to him. The whole day yesterday he actually forgot that he and Sam were only pretending to be in a relationship. It's become dangerous.

Sam snorted in his sleep and turned towards Blaine, unconsciously shuffling closer but Blaine used that movement to slip out of bed. He quietly walked out of his apartment and made his way across the roof. He shivered in the morning chill but faced the sun rising and the sun's rays warmed him a bit.

Blaine knew that in his case it was too late. He had already lost his heart to the blond. That danger had past. The danger was not his heart but his equilibrium. If he wanted a relationship with Sam, he needed to put some distance between them because he was so scared that he'd do something to scare him off for good. Besides, it might be too late for Blaine, but he loved Sam enough to want him to be happy. And what girl would have him if they thought he was taken?

He flashed to the memory of Sam and Rachel singing together and how they smiled at each other and the pain was like a knife to his gut. He almost bent double as he wrapped his arms around himself. _Oh this is bad. If this is how I feel over a girl I actually like for him! I can only imagine how bad it would be if he ended up with someone like Mercedes or, God forbid, Santana..._

Blaine was brought out of his reverie as a pair of strong arms enveloped him, wrapping them both in his quilt. He instinctively leaned back and could feel Sam's bare chest against his back. He started to soak up the warmth as Sam tightly wrapped the thick quilt around them both.

"I woke up and you were gone," Sam said simply. Blaine could hear the unspoken question.

"I think we've gone as far as we can with this, haven't we?" Blaine asked, proud at how steady his voice was. He refused to look at Sam, he knew how well the blond can read his face.

"Are you breaking up with me?" Sam asked with weak chuckle.

"It's time, Sam," Blaine said as firmly as he could. He had to do this, for Sam. For himself. He blinked when Sam's embrace got tighter. He could feel Sam's breath by his ear. Sam took a deep breath, and then another one. _What is the matter with him?_

"Why?" Sam's voice was steady but Blaine could feel the tension all over Sam's body. He sighed, and was troubled that it had come to this. They were both in too deep, this was proof. How else to explain why Sam was so upset over a _pretend_ relationship? He's confusing Sam.

He pulled away. Or at least tried to but Sam wouldn't let him go. "Sam," he said quietly and with a sigh Sam let him go. He took a few steps and composed his reply.

"We've accomplished what we set out to do," Blaine said. "Believe me when I tell you I'm really grateful but the schoolyear is ending and, and I hate to admit it, and we managed to keep Lipoff and the rest off our backs with this crazy idea of yours. But we should end it because it isn't fair to you, Sam. You should have the chance for a real relationship and you won't get that chance if people think you're with me."

Blaine kept himself still. He was afraid that if he relaxed for a little bit that he would lose it. There it was done. He had said it. When Sam spoke he nearly started because his voice was so near, Sam had moved closer without Blaine noticing.

"This pretend relationship we have?" Sam started, "This was better than any of the real relationships I've had. Why can't it just go on?"

"Oh I want it to," Blaine said before he could stop himself. He closed his eyes. _Ah shit. Oh well, maybe it's better this way. Just lay it all out. He deserves the truth and this is __**Sam**__. He would never hurt me. _Blaine opened his eyes and, unmindful of the tears beginning to pool there, turned to face Sam for the first time since he got up from bed.

He almost lost his train of thought, though, when he beheld him. Sam was standing on the roof, sunlight glinting off his blond hair, he had the quilt around his body but his bare shoulders and chest were exposed and early morning light making his skin look like gold. He knew he would remember this vision of Sam forever.

"And that's the problem," Blaine finally continued. "It's become too real to me Sam. I'm finding it harder and harder to remember that we're only pretending and that's not fair, to me or to you," Blaine took a deep breath and released it. _Now for the finale_, he thought.

"And because I love you."

Sam didn't move, just stood there. Blaine took courage that Sam didn't run screaming from him and ploughed on because it had become important to him that Sam understood where he was coming from, and where he was going.

"It's okay, Sam," he said with a sad smile, he could feel the warmth on his cheek as his tears finally overflowed. _Damn tears._ "I don't expect anything from you. Really I don't. I know that you can't love me the same way and that's okay, it really is. But you see why we can't continue on, right?" Blaine begged, "we've strayed from the original agreement. It feels like I'm cheating by being in this relationship when my feelings have changed. I broke Rule Five, Sam," Blaine smiled through his tears, "I'm not the same Blaine and I don't see you as that Sam."

He took another breath and wiped his tears with the back of his hand. "These past months have been the best for me, it really has." He snorted, "That is kinda pathetic, isn't it? That the memories I'll cherish the most is about something that we pretended to do; but there you go."

"I just wanted you to know. The truth. Because you deserve it, God, you deserve that at least. And it won't be weird, I'll do everything in my power to not make it weird because losing you..." And now Blaine really had to stop and his eyes blurred as the traitorous tears finally came threatening to burst like a deluge.

He suddenly felt warm hands on his face, thumbs wiping away the tears and as he blinked his eyes clear there stood Sam in front of him. The quilt had fallen down to his feet. And he had the softest, gentlest smile he ever saw.

"You, as my pretend boyfriend, were good for me and treated me better than any of my real girlfriends ever did," Sam said to him earnestly. "Do you think I would have done this for _anyone_ else other than you? You're _special_ to me Blaine, you would never, _ever_ lose me. Okay?"

Blaine nodded, the knot in his gut started to unravel. He reached up and held on to Sam's hands and he started to breathe again. But Sam's next words caused him to stop breathing.

"It became real to me, too."

And Blaine looked at Sam, really _looked _at him and their eyes met and Blaine gasped.

"I have a confession to make, too," Sam said moving forward, "I broke Rule Five months ago."

"So I guess I'm pathetic, too, then because these past few months have been the best bits of my life as well." And before Blaine could blink, Sam leaned forward and kissed him gently. Sam pulled back just a bit and looked deep into his eyes. "I just want you to know that I love you, too."

-?-

Sam didn't know if he's gay or not, honestly he just didn't care. As far as he's concerned he's in love with Blaine and if that means he's gay then he's gay. He's not interested in making out with another dude just to clarify that issue.

That's what Kurt doesn't seem to understand. Sam has always been a one-woman (or man in this case) man. Even with his exes, when he was with them—even if his feelings weren't as deep as they are now for Blaine—he was only with them. It never occurred to him look at anyone else. So now that Sam was with Blaine, he won't be looking at other guys or girls. Just the thought of thinking about a time he won't be with Blaine was upsetting for him that he won't even consider it. So the point is moot.

But Kurt said that it was important to identify if he's really gay or just gay for Blaine. Kurt had walked away in a huff when he said that if it makes him feel better, Sam will identify himself as gay. "So not the point!" Kurt had shouted as he stormed off.

* * *

_**I like to think of it as interesting look at the writing process, especially when you are collaborating. We had the plot (fake relationship), we had the twist (they fall in love while pretending to be in a relationship) and the epiphany. But the getting to those points took us to a different place and the epiphany that I wrote a long, long time ago no longer fit. I think **_**BNG**_** is a much richer story because of where we ended up taking it and I don't mind that we aren't using this scene (even then it was only a possibility and not set in stone) but I'm still glad I have a chance to share it anyway.**_


End file.
